


Not the Same

by Shadow Etherious (GothAlbinoAngel)



Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: F/F, Hurt/Comfort, PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-07
Updated: 2020-03-07
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:34:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22777219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GothAlbinoAngel/pseuds/Shadow%20Etherious
Summary: After what happened in Edolas, Lucy begins receding from her girlfriend. Erza goes to her in an effort to learn the reason. ErLu!Also on FF.net
Relationships: Lucy Heartfilia/Erza Scarlet
Kudos: 73





	Not the Same

**Author's Note:**

> So, I saw the Edolas arc in of Fairy Tail and considering my main Fairy Tail ship is Erlu, it kind of made me ache a bit to see the interactions between Knightwalker and Lucy. So, there's this because of that. Enjoy!
> 
> For anyone who recognizes this one, I've edited it before posting it on AO3. Just so ya know!

It had been a few weeks since they returned from Edolas. The rest of the guild didn't seem to mind that they'd been turned into a lacrima. Their friends had helped them escape being an explosive and set everything right, so there was nothing to worry about. Everything settled back into a regular routine now that they didn't have to worry about the other world's Anima trying to steal magic from their world.

Most of Team Natsu, including Wendy, Gajeel, and Carla, were fine with what had happened in Edolas. Especially since Natsu and Happy got to reunite with Lisanna after thinking she was dead for years. Carla was just thankful she hadn't been set up to kill her best friend. And Gajeel was happy to finally have an Exceed of his own.

However, there were two members of the group who'd been directly involved in the Edolas ordeal and weren't sharing the easy-going return to normalcy with their friends.

The days following the return from Edolas, Erza watched her girlfriend carefully. Lucy had begun to close herself off from Erza. She still acted like her usual bubbly self around everyone else in the guild, as if Edolas hadn't happened, but every time she was around Erza, she would become more subdued and barely interact with her girlfriend. Erza was unsure what could have caused this change, but it was breaking her heart that Lucy barely even acknowledged her existence anymore.

A week or two after the incident, Erza paid Lucy's apartment a visit. Since Lucy started closing herself off, Erza had been sleeping in the Fairy Hills dorms to give her some space. Tonight, however, she was craving the comfort of her girlfriend's arms and had come to cuddle.

Unfortunately, Lucy... rejected the contact. She mumbled something about not feeling well and thinking she might be coming down sick as she kept her distance from Erza. Erza watched her love avoid eye contact and felt something in her emotions snap.

"Lucy, _please_ talk to me," she pleaded, hesitantly reaching out. She felt her heart twist when Lucy shuffled back slightly.

"There's nothing to talk about," Lucy shrugged in faux-nonchalance.

Erza stared at her, hurt and confused. "What did I do wrong?"

"Nothing," Lucy said a little too quickly. "You didn't do anything wrong."

"I _must_ have," Erza persisted, tears brimming her eyes. "You... you're not the same around me. You haven't been since we got back from Edolas. Was... was my fighting in the other world unsatisfactory? Did you prefer I finish quickly to come join you?"

Lucy bit her lip, still refusing to look at Erza. She knew she should tell her girlfriend what was going on, but it was difficult. She didn't want to hurt Erza all over again, didn't want to break her heart after the disaster that was Jellal. But it wasn't something she wanted Erza to deal with, she needed to fix this on her own. It had happened to _her_ , so _she_ was going to heal the wounds created.

Erza stared at Lucy, concern and fear covering her expression. She wasn't sure exactly what was going on, but Lucy had _never_ rejected her this harshly before. Certainly, there had been small punishments, like no cuddling for a few days because she beat up someone who might not have deserved it, but this? Lucy was flat-out _refusing_ her, not even bothering to look in her _direction_. All Erza wanted to know was why. What had she done wrong?

After several more seconds of silence, Erza lowered her head with a nod. "Understood," she whispered, forcing the tears back for now. "I... I will have my things cleared out of your apartment by tomorrow evening."

"Wh... what?" Lucy turned slightly, hearing the heavy footsteps as Erza began to leave.

"I'm sorry for whatever I did to cause you so much unease," Erza murmured, not stopping. "I will... I'll leave you alone from now on. And... I'll stay behind when you and the others go off on jobs together."

Now, Lucy turned to face her completely, reaching out desperately. "Erza, wait!" she called. She didn't want this. She didn't want this at all. Erza paused at the door, not turning around as she waited. "Please, it's... It's really not your fault."

Slowly, Erza shifted to look at her. Lucy recoiled immediately, remembering _those_ eyes, _that_ smile, the pleasure written in every contour of _her_ face. Erza noticed the instant decline in her girlfriend's confidence and nodded, remaining by the door.

"It was her, wasn't it?" she inquired quietly. "The other Erza, Knightwalker?"

Lucy lowered her head, closing her eyes and nodding. Guess she couldn't hide this after all. "She... um..."

"What happened?" Erza asked, still not stepping forward. She longed to embrace her beloved, but feared another rejection would come if she got too close. No, if they were going to get to the bottom of this, she needed to remain at the door to uncover the answers. "What happened between the two of you?"

Lucy gritted her teeth together. It was something she _should_ tell her girlfriend. If she didn't, Erza would just take the blame on herself for something her counterpart had done. The weight of that shame would rest on Erza's shoulders and she wouldn't even deserve it. No, Lucy refused to let Erza do that to herself. Even if it meant she had to tell Erza what was going on.

"She tried to kill me," Lucy whispered, the words hanging in the air for a moment. Tears fell to the bedsheets as she took a shaky breath. It almost hurt to say it out loud. "She picked me up by the cuffs on my hands and swung me over a ledge. She said she was going to kill me, that she had killed several Fairy Tail wizards in the past." Bare fists clenched the sheets furiously as Lucy stared at her hands. Rage built in her chest as she said it. That woman... "And she smiled. She said she was going to kill me, with your voice and your face, and she _smiled_ about it! She told me that suffering was what she lived for, that it was her favorite thing. And she grinned when she threw me over the ledge. I was falling... and the last thing I would have seen... would have been your face laughing at my death."

Erza felt utterly defeated. She had no way of easing a fear like this one. It may not have been _her_ that had caused Lucy such distress, but it had been a _visage_ of her. For all she knew, her girlfriend could have been having _nightmares_ about the ordeal the entire time since they returned. Not only that, but keeping her distance must have been hard on Lucy too. She'd probably been trying to work through the pain all by herself.

 _She's too noble for her own good sometimes,_ Erza thought fondly. She requipped into her pajamas and walked forward. She wasn't entirely sure how to help Lucy through the trauma, but she would do her best.

Lucy slowly lifted her head when she heard Erza coming closer. She still couldn't quite look at her, not after explaining what happened. Erza slid onto the bed and took Lucy's smaller form in her arms. She snuggled close to Lucy, enjoying the smooth skin against her own battle-roughened body. Glancing down, auburn eyes surveyed the object of her affection for a moment. Here goes.

"Lucy, look at me," Erza half-asked, half commanded softly.

Lucy gritted her teeth and forced her head to gradually lift up, her eyes meeting the auburn ones of her girlfriend. As she looked into those eyes, though, she didn't see any malice or bloodlust. Starting in surprise, Lucy pulled back slightly to look at Erza completely. The smile on Erza's face wasn't evil or malevolent; it was warm and soft, shining gently down at her.

And it wasn't _her_ smile.

 _That's right,_ Lucy told herself with a deep breath. _That Erza… she's not **my** Erza. My Erza loves me and would do anything to protect me, even at the cost of her own health._ Taking another deep breath, she smiled shyly up at her girlfriend. "I-it's going to take a little time to get over it," she murmured apologetically.

"And I will be with you every single second," Erza promised, nuzzling her cheek into the soft blonde tresses affectionately.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you," Lucy mumbled.

"As it was I who was causing you pain, it's understandable." Erza tightened her arms around Lucy just slightly. "Don't worry, though. I'm just glad I know what's wrong. Let's get some sleep."

Lucy snuggled into the muscular frame and slowly drifted off with Erza wrapped protectively around her. Later into that night, Erza awoke to find Lucy shifting uncomfortably, her eyebrows knitting together with the signs of a nightmare. Leaning down, she nuzzled their cheeks together, running her fingers soothingly over the smaller woman's back and shoulders. Gradually, Lucy calmed from the nightmare and Erza smiled, kissing the top of her love's head before sinking back into sleep as well.

**Author's Note:**

> And there you go. I really enjoy thinking of sweet things for these two. I should give them a pure fluff fic when I'm over being sick.


End file.
